This may sound really far out and strange, but I'm not so sure that dreams are just really dreams. I do not have any scientific reasoning for this, but it's just a theory that I have. I believe that dreams are portals to other worlds. I think that somewhere in time, these dreams are actually taking place.
I can't really explain this feeling, except that some dreams have felt so so real, that I can't help believe that in a way they are. It's like an alternate life or something.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Eh
So tired of politics, and of people who think they know everything about the election.
Kind of tired but I'm on a bad sleeping pattern.
I had a good day today. My lesson went really well and Freddie and I applied for our marriage license, so we can be legally wed now.
Please help me think of all the friends that I have that love me. If you are out there, let me know. I have trouble looking at the positives.
Kind of tired but I'm on a bad sleeping pattern.
I had a good day today. My lesson went really well and Freddie and I applied for our marriage license, so we can be legally wed now.
Please help me think of all the friends that I have that love me. If you are out there, let me know. I have trouble looking at the positives.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Remembering Shitty First Drafts
Well, I'm not quite as down as I have been the past few days. To be honest, I was fed a helpful serving of BS soup today, which just reminded me how some of the people in my circle can act and react to things. Eh, everyone has their own theories on things. Together, we could submit a thesis. I only wish that I had this sort of brain power when it came to school work. Oooh research.
Anyhoo, I'm pretty grateful to everyone who has put up with my whining. I'm no easy sell on forgetting things and looking the other way. When there's a bright side, somehow it always seems to be hiding behind the clouds. Every day gets better, though. And you know, The Golden Girls is on right now, and that's a show that has always comforted me. If only certaiin people hadn't gone all All About Eve on us, maybe our group would still be the same, but we're not, and me torturning myself by idolizing the past is really not going to help.
If any of you out there know him, I will request that you name at least five really stupid things that he's done to me over the years I've known him. This will remind me that he wasn't all good and pure, and that maybe he always had it in him to be a big ole jerkface.
However, when I am not happy, I tend to be a better writer. As my great brother Rob once said, "We should keep her depressed. She writes better." (This was during the super emo years of junior year of high school, blech), I have to find something valid about that statement. My emotions are at their purest and rawest when I am sad. Somehow, words just spring out of my mouth, ripe and ready to describe and create.
My only problem that I am running into is my typical problem of being discouraged because things are not perfect right away.
Side note- why must the television continue to torture me with commercials for Sonic, when there is absolutely not one nearby me? So unfair!
Anyhoo, I keep having to remind myself of shitty first drafts, 2nd drafts, third drafts and so on. I just finished the 2nd draft of a story that I had been working on for maybe a month or a month and a half. I don't know. I'm not really good at gauging time here. I mean, I'm the person who couldn't remember that my last good memory with Baconface happened over two years ago. Ooops. But it feels like 6 months ago in my mind, because in my life, time doesn't really matter because it goes by so quickly. But yeah, so now I am awaiting comments from my reviewers on the story before I move forward to a third draft, even though I already have a pretty good idea of where the story is headed. I did start new story yesterday that I continued onward with today. It's based partially on my relationship and nonrelationship with Baconface, and is actually something different than my usual material, structure wise- but that's great. It's allowing me to explore new avenues.
Eh, so maybe one by one all of my friends should drop me until I feel so bad that I just end up with a freakin' novel.
It's always the ones you want the most who end up slipping away.
Anyhoo, I'm pretty grateful to everyone who has put up with my whining. I'm no easy sell on forgetting things and looking the other way. When there's a bright side, somehow it always seems to be hiding behind the clouds. Every day gets better, though. And you know, The Golden Girls is on right now, and that's a show that has always comforted me. If only certaiin people hadn't gone all All About Eve on us, maybe our group would still be the same, but we're not, and me torturning myself by idolizing the past is really not going to help.
If any of you out there know him, I will request that you name at least five really stupid things that he's done to me over the years I've known him. This will remind me that he wasn't all good and pure, and that maybe he always had it in him to be a big ole jerkface.
However, when I am not happy, I tend to be a better writer. As my great brother Rob once said, "We should keep her depressed. She writes better." (This was during the super emo years of junior year of high school, blech), I have to find something valid about that statement. My emotions are at their purest and rawest when I am sad. Somehow, words just spring out of my mouth, ripe and ready to describe and create.
My only problem that I am running into is my typical problem of being discouraged because things are not perfect right away.
Side note- why must the television continue to torture me with commercials for Sonic, when there is absolutely not one nearby me? So unfair!
Anyhoo, I keep having to remind myself of shitty first drafts, 2nd drafts, third drafts and so on. I just finished the 2nd draft of a story that I had been working on for maybe a month or a month and a half. I don't know. I'm not really good at gauging time here. I mean, I'm the person who couldn't remember that my last good memory with Baconface happened over two years ago. Ooops. But it feels like 6 months ago in my mind, because in my life, time doesn't really matter because it goes by so quickly. But yeah, so now I am awaiting comments from my reviewers on the story before I move forward to a third draft, even though I already have a pretty good idea of where the story is headed. I did start new story yesterday that I continued onward with today. It's based partially on my relationship and nonrelationship with Baconface, and is actually something different than my usual material, structure wise- but that's great. It's allowing me to explore new avenues.
Eh, so maybe one by one all of my friends should drop me until I feel so bad that I just end up with a freakin' novel.
It's always the ones you want the most who end up slipping away.
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